Settling in

After getting a job in early December I was pretty thrilled- this is what it has all been about! I'm licensed, I'm employed, people call me Doctor all day long- good stuff!

It is good stuff. It is. But I find myself feeling less satisfied than I thought I would be. Part of it is that this is not my dream job-- I'm working very hard for not much money, even though I do like the work. But a big part too is that feeling of stagnation.

For the past, oh, 25 years I've been working towards a goal. In school, mostly. Now it is up to me to stimulate my brain, to set myself challenges, and to not get stuck in too much of a stiff routine. The transition from grad student to just "employed" has been a surprisingly emotionally laden one.

It is true that much might also be attributed to our serious desire to move out of state and truly settle down. I think that if I knew this was to be a "career" job, I would either not have taken it or would have a different attitude towards it. But as it is, this job is a place holder for the time we remain in California. It just feels hard to be as invested in this present than I used to be in my future.

My license, in dollars and cents

Hooray! Last Friday was the first payday at my new job, meaning my first payday as a newly minted licensed psychologist. I was really happy about finally getting off the Captain Awesome dole and feeling like a true participating member of our family. We weren't going hungry without my paycheck, but it is something we have both been looking forward to, naturally.

Friday morning CA checked our bank account: no direct deposit. Well, we all know that it takes time sometimes for the direct deposit to kick in. I thought that maybe I'd get a paper check for my first income installment. But by Friday evening, after checking the mailboxes at work and at home, I still hadn't received a check. Hmmm.

Saturday morning I emailed my boss, politely sending the message "WTF???" Saturday afternoon's mail brought hope: a paycheck addressed to me! Dr. M! Very exciting.

I opened my paycheck, and was flummoxed: it was a check made out to me for the princely sum of "Zero Dollars and Zero Cents". The attached printout duly noted that I had worked 80 hours over the past pay period, but maintained that my compensation for this time was "00". This could not be good.

I emailed my boss again, updating her on my growing body of evidence that there was no money coming my way. Monday morning we faxed a copy of my empty paycheck to HR, who to that point swore that I had been paid. "Check your bank account," I was told several times. "Um, dude, you haven't paid me," I replied. "Harrumph," they responded.

By Monday afternoon we were finally all in agreement: I was a pro bono psychologist. My boss ended up writing me a paper check on Wednesday so that I wouldn't have to wait another two weeks to be paid.

I'm keeping the original check, though. It is good to know that six and a half years of blood, sweat, tears, and student loans all added up to Zero Dollars and Zero Cents.